today was just about the dumbest day in the history of days.
i just feel like things kept piling up on top of other things and i just am not in the mood for any of it right now.
im being a freak right now with some of my friends.
but the thing is, i can never be as much of a freak as i want to be.
and i know how you feel
i really, really do.
but its hard for me. everything
everything is hard for me
im a lot different than you in this way. its just a lot....different.
i just want everything to be okay. i want to be settled in everything. i want to be home in bluffton at tu pueblo with zach and sam. i want to go visit haiden with dustin and jordan. i want to go to florida to see christian and dakota. i want to be around my friends from home because i feel like they will really get it and i can just be myself around them.
not that i cant be myself here. but its hard to be yourself when you are also trying to cater to everyone elses needs. plus idk. just stuff.
luckily i will have amber with me next year.
which may help. idk.