heading home.

so the second half of the trip was at least a small bit better than the first. after all the funeral stuff and laying around having nothing to do and saddness and blah. i think the last of the unpleasant, sad things was today when we cleaned out grampas closet a bit. for some crazy reason ellen really wanted to give some stuff to my dad. in turn, i took one of grampas shirts. i have one of great grampas flannel shirts and i sleep in it. i figured it was only right if i had one of my own grampas shirts too. they are all so crazy looking and eccentric. i love them, so i took one and its so big one me. which is good, i suppose. it was hard for ellen, i think. i think everything is hard for her lately. she seems okay, and then shes crying. and then she seems okay and then shes crying. i mean, obviously it would be hard for her. but its harder than she makes it look. thats what im saying. i think its hard for momo too. she doesnt really know where she belongs and its just hard. i can imagine that situation would just be stupid and awful. i would hate it. these are the flowers from his funeral and arent they just so beautiful? i usually dont like arranged flowers very much but they were just gorgeous so i had to take a picture. and they are even prettier in person.

anyways, today was okay. we went to a mexican restaurant called Los Cabos in Tulsa with Ellen and Dick and his wife Mary-Kay. it was fun and my chicken and steak tacos were delicious! there was even a small group of mexican musicians (i say this because i really struggle with spelling mariache..?) and they were fun too! they sang right next to our table so we could barely hear ourselves think but i was okay because i enjoy it a lot. and i looked cute! today was the first day that i actually tried to get cute and it was sure fun. i even wore my new tank top from the gap =] i enjoy things like that. its so nice to feel cute and not fat and gross. lol. its been a while for that. it really has. but i have made a vow....i am going to go to the gym every day once i get home until i leave for tennessee. and thats a big goal because i never go to the gym. hopefully i can convince aaronpoo to come with me and we can work out together. we went on bike rides together for a while but for that to work, i really need to just get my own bike. my own cute, old fashioned bike. i want one really bad. so i hope that gets me started a little bit. im sure i will work out some while in tennessee. amy has her own personal gym in her house and i always use it when we go. its fun having a summer routine. i wake up, eat fruit for breakfast, swim, lay out, work out, shower, eat some lunch, get ready for the day, then go out! and thats exactly what i will be doing THIS trip except i will have my very best most beautiful best friend with me and our handsome, charming boyfriends and it will just be amazing. so hopefully i can kickstart my life once i am home from this less than charming oklahoma "vacation".
anyways. we said goodbye to ellen today and i really hope she will be okay on her own. we cant stay forever (mom hasnt been home in three weeks) but i really feel like she shouldnt be alone yet. i just feel like thats not good for her. she needs more girlfriends in the area. i think that would really help the situation, if she had girlfriends who could come stay with her. but she really just has all the couple friends that her and grampa were friends with. which is good, but its not the same as having a few good girlfriends. i just hope shes okay. anyways, heres a picture of her with like maybe six of the 70 dogs ? lol. just kidding, theres only 9. hahahha only. lol. a lot of dogs. but she loves them all so much.

its just really funny.

so anyways, we leave in the morning to go home and i could not possibly be more relieved. it will be so nice to be home. plus i really miss aaron. like really miss aaron. so it will be so nice to see him. but i think this trip home will be really fun. we have two stops on the way to st. louis, the russell stovers outlet, and the jesse james museum. and its only like 6 hours to st. louis. once we get there, we are going to go shopping in all the cute shops along the river and stuff. then we are staying in a really nice hotel and leaving in the morning to come back to bluffton. so we will be home midday and i dont have to work, but aaron does. which leaves me plenty of time to unpack and get myself cleaned up before i see him once he's off work.  =] it sounds so nice. sigh.




heers.
<3