This Week The Trend

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Bluffton, OH, United States
doing little, enjoying lots.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

things i will never understand.

elyse posts my personal stuff about the fight we had, exposing feelings that were clearly between me and her on her blog. i got very upset, sobbing, and texted her to tell her not to post stuff like that.

the response i got back was "its my blog and i will post whatever i want because the people who care about me want to know whats going on."

no sympathy for my feelings or for the fact that she was laying me bare to the general public. no respect to the fact that it was private.

but when i make a blog post about her, not one about our fight, just about stuff..... i get a message from her girlfriend telling me i need to stop.

making me out to be the bad guy.

when its obvious
that all i do
all i ever do
is react spitefully to the things she does and says that kill me inside.
"i love randomly deleting people i hate from facebook"
and then, im deleted.
i spent three hours sobbing over that.
she probably didnt think i would even notice.
but i did.
i always do.
because i still love her.
always will.

and this birthday is going to be miserable, just like the last one. because all i can think about is how she isn't here. shes somewhere else, hating me.


1 comment:

lil sis said...

She hurts you because she is still hurting. which means she still loves you. Which is fine, but you dont have to fix things. just because you love someone, doesnt mean they are good for you or you are good for them.
I love you and want you to stop hurting.
Praying for your soulmate.